Now, it gets interesting...

Ok, here's the stuff that some of you may not be equipped to hear. Or comprehend. Or remotely understand.

Yep, I'm talking about my personal pregnancy experience.

In the beginning, even right before I took the test, I noticed that I was exhausted. Since I have hypothyroidism, I was considering visiting my doc to see if my meds needed to be increased. I was sluggish, zombie-like and sleeping way more than usual. Now, don't get me wrong, I love to sleep. I'm not one of those people who thinks sleeping is wasting your life away. Give me my 8 hours, or give me death!

But this was different. This is more than just a need for a little nap in the afternoon. This was trying to get a little nap in and waking up 5 hours later, still on the couch, in a puddle of my own drool. Out like a light.

I was also peeing more. I pee alot anyway.

But this was different (notice the trend?). I HAD TO GO, and I HAD TO GO NOW. Since we were thinking of having a baby, I had just finished reading "You: Having a Baby" by Dr. Oz. I never remembered him saying that that was a sign of early pregnancy. I guess my body was trying to pee out the zygote?

The kicker was when I noticed breast sensitivity (cover your eyes, guys). That was the end of the line for me, and I took a pregnancy test. And, since I'm currently writing this blog, we all know how that turned out. (See post 1)

Three days after confirming my pregnancy with my brand new OB, I had a little scare and had to go to the ER. Well, all of that was just fine, but, to be on the safe side, my doc put me on Progesterone. Progesterone is the devil's medicine. It made me dizzy, flash hot/cold, and have the dreaded morning sickness. And, once that started....well.....I'll leave out those details.

Luckily for my appetite and our wallets, I only had to be on the meds until week 10. The sickness didn't totally go away, neither did the hot flashes or the dizziness really. But, we didn't have to shell out the moolah for the meds that my health insurance didn't cover. (Thanks BCBS)

In the early weeks, I was beginning to wonder if everything that could go wrong in my pregnancy, would. I thought I developed an allergic reaction to the progesterone. I was miserable. I was going in for my first ultrasound in just a few days, so I lathered myself up in cortisone creams and diaper rash ointments until the appointment. Imagine my surprise when she told me I had tinea cruris.
"I have JOCK ITCH??" My doctor snorted and looked at me, puzzled. Like, she couldn't understand why I was so emphatic in my statement.
I was mortified. I'm laying there, with my husband in the room, and I have jock itch. So now, I'm a puking, peeing, hot-flashing, dizzy pregnant woman, with jock itch. AND, I'm about to get my first ultrasound, which is done vaginally. AND I DIDN'T KNOW THAT!!! I was clueless. I might even cry. But, I held it together.

Turns out tinea cruris is relatively common in pregnancy. At that moment, I knew I had to resolve myself to the fact that if it will happen, it will happen to me.

Now, that that part is over, and the most humiliating thing I could possibly admit is on the internets for everyone to see, the rest is a piece of cake.

The rest isn't nearly as interesting. The weeks fly by. I'm still uncharacteristically tired, but other things are changing as well. My work pants are tight. My jeans are tightER. My teeth are sensitive. I have ZITS!

So, at 3.5 months, I graduated up. I put on my first pair of maternity pants. You know what? All I could think was, "Dang, I wish my butt looked this good in regular pants!" I was sold.

Now, shirts on the other hand....that's a different story.

All the books, articles and magazines I've read prepare you for some of the sensations of pregnancy. But, not really. If they told you, in detail, all of the things your body would be going through, I think we wouldn't have to teach sex ed in school. Fear would be a really great motivator.

First, there's the "round ligament pain." I discovered this one evening, sprawled on the couch. I had to sneeze, and just like every sneeze in my life before that moment, I didn't change much about my current physical arrangement. The sneeze hits and I feel this very intense pain near my inguinal area (leg meets torso). I was taken aback. I quickly tried to sit up, and the pain happened again. I immediately thought I had a hernia, since I was prone to everything going wrong in my pregnancy (see above.) Luckily, I found it was just the ligaments stabilizing my uterus. When you get up quickly, stretch out completely, lay in certain positions and cough or sneeze, you will feel your round ligaments. Joy.

Next, speaking of coughing and sneezing....there's the whole "bladder control" issue. I'm not even showing and I am experiencing things I thought I had months to prepare for! I won't go into detail here. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

Also, something I was unaware of....mouth problems. Not anything painful, just inconvenient, and - yet again - embarrassing. My teeth are "dirtier" than usual. I have to brush constantly to get that sticky feeling out of my mouth. And, my teeth are more sensitive.

And, to top it off, my face begins to erupt like the surface of the sun. Huge, painful hormone pimples. I work in a building full of florescent lights. So, I look like Pizza the Hut.

But, despite some rather upsetting side effects and a very reluctant parting of ways with dairy, my pregnancy has been picture perfect! :)

My next OB visit was much less eventful, but much more profound. After waiting in the lobby for the better part of an hour and a half, I was ushered into a room and my OB's Nurse Practitioner came in with a Doppler. For those of you not in the know, a doppler machine allows you to hear the heartbeat without an ultrasound. So, you can hear baby, but not see baby. She lubes up my belly and moved the wand around til she found the heartbeat. I was laying there, holding the mic, listening to the heartbeat when I heard this swishing, swooshing sound. I asked what that was, because she was holding the wand steady.
"It's your baby moving."
I still can't think of that moment today without getting choked up. Here it was, the size of a plum, doing flips and moving around inside of me! I think that day changed alot of things for me.

Now....back to my current state.

Moods swings are at an all-time low. Which, most people should be grateful for, because I have a very powerful tongue-biting reflex. The people that I am referring to are those ladies that have been through this one or more or multiple times that feel the need to "warn" me of what is to come. You all know what I'm talking about. Those Debbie Downers that want you to be as miserable as they were in their pregnancies, passive-aggressively giving you advice and warnings and ending it with "But, I wouldn't change it for the world!"

"Oh, you think you have hot flashes now? Just wait, you'll get all sweaty 'down there'....the yeast infections are coming! But, I wouldn't change it for the world!"

"Oh, if you think you're big now, just wait. And, your back will kill you when you get big and fat and after you deliver, your stomach will look like a crumpled paper bag and you will cry because you will never look the same. But, I wouldn't change it for the world!"

"I had a horrible labor. The pain was so bad I passed out once. And, I tore all the way to my anus. Blood was everywhere. But, I wouldn't change it for the world!"

Oh. Great. Thanks for the words of wisdom.

And, one more thing: Stop rubbing my belly!

So, now I'm here, May 20th, just about 15 weeks, wearing maternity clothes and pulling my knees up to my chest any time I have to sneeze or cough, but enjoying being pregnant none-the-less. It does grant you extra attention, after all.

I wouldn't change it for the world!